Wednesday, August 20, 2008

These Olympics are Special

But not Special Olympics you dig? Riveting and compelling and controversial they are too! But for real, the best parts of watching these games is due to the competition and the chicks, the feminine ones that is.

- Gymnastics: First off Alicia Sacramone aka Sacrament of Matrimony got robbed. That one chick fell and won wtf. Our girl Nasty Nastia got robbed too, and I can’t believe she lost to a 10 year old former sweatshop worker! No for real, these girls need to get carbon dated to see how old they are. I’m not blaming the actual competitors though, its about the officials. The judges are wack – might as well have fan voting! My girl Shawn Johnson aka But I Wear Rocawear probably is my fav – you can’t help but root for her. She just seems so genuinely happy to compete and I’m glad she struck gold with the balance beam. I’ve been watching on-and-off so when she hugged that Chinese coach first I was like kinda random, but it turned out to be her actual coach lol. Its just hard to envision a first-gen Chinese coach in Iowa!

- Track-N-Field: I felt bad for Lolo aka who’s your Filipino Granddaddy Jones after she tripped over that 2nd to last hurdle. It’s a trip you train 4 year for like a 12 second event. She’s pretty fly too, must be her 5’6” with brown eyes caramel complexion [still she’s no Claudia Ortiz!]. Usain Bolt aka of Lightning has mad swagger that I can appreciate it. Dude just effortlessly sets world records on the grandest stage and reminds you if you didn’t see it, and gives new definition when you hear Cool Runnings. Remember the name: Leryn Franco! Thanks to Yahoo!, I got her on my radar. Do yourself a favor and click on the link – she’s definitely a stunner. She might replace Allison Stokke as my favorite pole vaulter in the world. Then again, these are the only 2 I know haha.

- Table Tennis: I was watching UHD then saw Canada vs. Brazil, but it was an Indian dude vs. a Japanese dude. I was shook for a sec, but I was like that’s pretty cool. I like diverse looking countries.

- Hoops: Aight I haven’t seen one minute of action, and that’s kinda disappointing that I watched more women’s marathon than basketball! Go USA though.

- Steeplechase: There are a lot of random sports in the ‘Pics, but I always trip off this event. Why one hurdle into water lol?? Yes its part of T&F and has probably been an event since the days of Odysseus but whatever.

- Swimming: What’s going on here? Haha sike! While I appreciate the greatness Mike Phelps has shown, I’m pretty pessimistic if he’ll transcend the sport. Your homies aren’t just gonna say, hey let’s race in the pool! I’m certain he’ll be a good pitchman, but I doubt the profile of competitive swimming will be raised much.

- Golf: Wait its not a sport yet, but I learned it was one back in ’04. That is 1904. I’m hoping for a 2016 return.

- Speedwalking: I can’t hate because their times are probably better than my running!

I’m proposing though the Non-Athletic Olympics, and you can have darts, billiards, poker, spelling, 10-keying, dominoes, hot dog eating, rock-paper-scissors and whatever else there are world champions in. Ughhh The Philippines would hella represent and since I got ties I would qualify for something! And ESPN8 can air all these events. Speaking of, Dodgeball would be a dope sport here too haha.